Learning to Breathe: An Evening with Terry McMillan

Image courtesy of USA Today.

Too many of us are hung up on what we don’t have, can’t have, or won’t ever have. We spend too much energy being down, when we could use that same energy – if not less of it – doing, or at least trying to do, some of the things we really want to do. ~ Terry McMillan, Disappearing Acts (1989)
On April 20, 2013, my partner and I attended “Learning To Breathe: An Evening with Terry McMillan.”  The event, presented in partnership with the Sixth & I Historic Synagogue, was part of the PEN/Faulkner 2012/2013 Reading Series.  Moderated by writer, professor, and PEN/Faulkner board member Lisa Page, this event offered readers the chance to exchange in conversation with one of the most creative, thought-provoking, and inspiring literary minds of time.  

“Learning To Breathe” was divided into three partsreading, interview, and Q&A.  During the reading, McMillan read a selection from her upcoming novel Who Asked You?  With an anticipated release date some time in fall 2013, the novel will be told from the perspective of 15 characters in first-person.  Who Asked You? is full of wit, realism, and social commentarytold in McMillan’s signature style.

One of the key aspects of McMillan’s work has been admitting or getting to a truth.  She has a knack for using self-realization, self-discovery, and humor to help her characters get to their truth.  The common belief is that we have to go through something or be down-and-out in order to get to our truth.  McMillan dissuaded this notion saying, “You don’t always have to be depressed to admit a truth.”  

McMillan has said, “Writing is a form of praying on paper.”  It provides us with a way to really understand who we are, what makes us tick, and what we care about.  She shared that she wants us all to be happy and “sickening in love… be assets and not liabilities… be happy about who we are…[be] forgiving…”  Her critically acclaimed and award-winning novels like Mama, Disappearing Acts, Waiting to Exhale, and A Day Late And A Dollar Short are evident of this.  In addition, McMillan’s writing has afforded her (and her readers) greater empathy, compassion, and a better understanding of people she might not have in real life.

When asked about how she develops her characters, McMillan said you not only have to listen to how people talk but you also have to get outside of yourself in order to authentically tell someone else’s story.  “You have to get lost in someone else’s skin,” she says.  “Because otherwise it’s phony.”  For every story she’s written, she knows every single detail about her characters.  Even if the details don’t make it into the book, it illustrates the point about knowing who (and what) you’re writing about.  This, I’m sure, is how and why the characters always speak to you when in the midst of writing projects (as McMillan and so many other writers have noted).

As far as her process, McMillan never writes more than one chapter a day.  A work day for her can vary from two hours to eight or more hours.  But she admits that she’s quite spent when she’s finished writing for the day.  For chapters that are emotionally taxing, she may take a break and continue writing them the next day.  McMillan emphasized that no matter what you do, you must “find your own rhythm.”

McMillan also imparted her insights on the ever-changing publishing industry and provided some advice to aspiring authors.  She said the industry is racist and sexist, to some extent.  And that it is particularly harder for new authors to get contracts, especially for African American authors.  When McMillan’s best-selling book Waiting To Exhale was released in 1992, the publishing world was turned upside down by the mere fact that so many black people were reading and buying books (in droves).  If you looked at the press, you would think a new renaissance had started (when really it was nothing new).  I was only 10 years old at the time, and like McMillan, I too was insulted because the implication was that black people did not read (let alone write) and that we didn’t buy books.  The reality is that the publishing industry had ignored some of their largest book buying demographics.  To take advantage reap the benefits of this, the industry started beefing up promotion and doling out large advances to several black writers at the time.  Many of these writers were pummeled with accolades and kudos that were well beyond anyone’s expectations.  And sadly, you don’t hear about many of them today.

Fast-forward years later to the impact of a fledgling economy, and the infiltration of Corporate America into every facet of our lives, and we understand why it’s so hard for writers to get contracts.  And if you do get a contract, forget about book tours.  The chances of your publishing company setting up book tours are slim-to-none.  McMillan said she is quite fortunate to be able to live off of the royalties from her book sales, but she acknowledges that she, too, could be standing in the welfare line at any moment.  Her advice to aspiring writers: do not get discouraged and do not quit your day job. 

The next time McMillan is in town, I highly advise checking her out.  You won’t regret it.  

To learn more about Terry McMillan, go to her official website: http://www.terrymcmillan.com/.

Bibliography:
Mama (1987)
Disappearing Acts (1989)
Breaking Ice: An Anthology of Contemporary American Fiction (1990)
Waiting To Exhale (1992)
How Stella Got Her Groove Back (1996)
A Day Late And A Dollar Short (2001)
The Interruption of Everything (2005)
It’s Okay If You’re Clueless: And 23 More Tips For The College Bound (2006)
Getting To Happy (2010)

A Tribute to Our Beloved Writers

 
Performance artist, poet, playwright, and novelist Ntozake Shange. Image courtesy of Tumblr.
Your words have moved us
Warmed us in ways only the gods could.
Yours were the voices of nations
     speaking for others who had been silenced,
     or for those who hadn’t quite found their voice yet.
Your stories evoked emotions
     some we never imagined anyone could tap so literally within us.
But you’re the catalysts,
     the messengers,
     transparent vehicles for lessons of a higher kind.
And we—the recipients of your gifts
     continue to stand in awe, honor, and praise,
     for the art of your words dutifully expresses our humanity.
© 2012 BuddahDesmond 

Five Inspirational Jams that Lift Me Up

Music has always been a constant in my life.  During the ups and downs (and all that lies between), music has served as an extension of my moods and emotions.  Speaking to me in ways almost like nothing else, the sweet sound of music has inspired megiving the push I needed to go on.  Here’s a list of five inspirational jams that never cease to keep me lifted.

Sounds of Blackness – “I’m Going All the Way” from Africa to America; The Journey of the Drum (1994)

Now I know better/It’s time to move on/My determination/Is what keeps me strong/Oh I believe in myself/Like never before/Faith is the key/To unlock the door/Whatever it takes to make it/I’m going all the way/I may be down sometimes/But I won’t be down always…”

Africa to America; The Journey of the Drum by Sounds of Blackness, is a moving album with inspiring songs of history, faith, love, and soul. With Jimmy Jam & Terry Lewis at the helm, they created inspirational/gospel music without boundaries.  Songs like the pulsing, rhythmic single “I’m Going All The Way” proved that inspirational/gospel could be relevant and contemporary without forsaking its message.  Fueled by Ann Nesby’s rousing lead vocal, the song channels the reality that life may not always go the way we want it to.  But no matter what comes our way, we must go forward.  We cannot give up or give on…”We must hold on to [our goals].” We must go all the way.

Mary Mary – “Go Get It” from Go Get It (2012)

You were made to live a good life and that’s what I believe/So hit the floor say a prayer start working you got to do something/It’s alright to crawl before you walk it’s alright to walk before you run/But if you wanna get what you never got gotta do something that you never done/Go get it, Go Get it, Go get it, Go get it, Go get it/
Go get yo blessing…”


As soon as I heard “Go Get It” on Mary Mary’s We reality series, I was immediately moved by the urgency of its music, vocals, and message.  Without a doubt, it’s one of Mary Mary’s best songs.  Produced by longtime producer Warryn Campbell, the song tells us that we can’t achieve anything if we do not go after it.  We can’t sit around and wait for our lives to change.  If we want something we have to make it happen.  Count it on faith, if you play your part—the blessings will follow.  Whether you’re a Christian believer or not, the message is undeniable.

Whitney Houston – “Step By Step” from The Preacher’s Wife (1996)
“And this old road is rough and ruined/So many dangers along the way/So many burdens might fall upon me/So many troubles that I have to face/Oh, but I won’t let my spirit fail me/Oh, I won’t let my spirit go/Until I get to my destination/I’m gonna take it slowly cuz I’m making it mine/Step By Step (you know I’m taking it), bit by bit (bit by bit, come move),
stone by stone (yeah), brick by brick (brick by brick by brick by brick mmm…).”


“Step By Step” was the second single released from The Preacher’s Wife soundtrack.  The album found Houston returning back to her roots.  Primarily a Gospel album, The Preacher’s Wife also contained R&B/Soul and Pop tunes of love and inspiration.  “Step By Step” is a funky, uptempo tune written by the iconic Annie Lennox.  Musically and vocally stellar, the song encourages us to remain faithful, steadfast, and committed while on our journey.  We can’t let anything detract or or get to us.  We’ve got to keep moving.

Janet Jackson – “Strong Enough” from The Velvet Rope (1997)
“I know that it’s not been easy/Trying to make it in this crazy world/People ’round you try to stop you/Stomp you saying that you don’t belong/…You must remember that/You were born with blood of kings and queens/And can’t be stopped/Stay stronger my brother you can’t be stopped/No, you can’t be stopped/Don’t ever let nobody tell you you ain’t strong enough/Strong enough, don’t let nobody tell you you ain’t/Strong enough, don’t let nobody tell you…”

“Can’t Be Stopped” is the hidden bonus track on Janet Jackson’s critically-acclaimed, artistic triumph, The Velvet Rope.  The song is a lush, uplifting jam featuring Ms. Jackson’s assured, layered vocals, socially conscious lyrics, and a soulful sound reminiscent of Marvin Gaye’s “Inner City Blues.”  In this life, we may come up against forces designed to try to keep us complacent, down, and out.  If we give in, the negative forces will win.  But if we proceed and persist, we will be successful. We will be victorious.  We will be unstoppable.

Vesta Williams – “Better Days” from Seven (2013)

“Today it didn’t rain/The sun came out again/The cloudy days seem to be over/It’s like I found a four-leaf clover/And changed misfortunes of mine/Troubles on my heart/Things falling apart/The fight in me was slowly dying/But never did I give up trying/To find my moment to shine/Better days are coming my way/Heaven smiles and I’m still okay/Better times will be yours and mine/And I think it’s going to be just fine…”

“Better Days” is Vesta’s most recent single from her final studio album Seven.  The smoothed out groove of the music (straddling the line between R&B/Soul and Contemporary Jazz) and Vesta’s emotive, yet somewhat restrained vocal performance makes this a welcomed addition to any fan’s music collection.  Released in the fall of 2012, I was drawn to its message of perseverance and faith through it all.  No matter how dark or how long the days get, we must trust and believe that better days are not too far behind.  But we must it through the bad days before we can enjoy the fruits of better days.

 

Happy Women’s History Month

Author and Spiritualist lecturer, Harriet E. Wilson was the first African American to publish a novel in North America. Her autobiographical novel, Our Nig: Sketches From The Life Of A Free Black, was published in 1859.

Happy Women’s History Month!  During the month of March, we honor all women who’ve made (or are making) significant contributions not only to the fabric of our society but also to the world.  

The origins of Women’s History Month date back to the very first celebration of International Women’s History Day (which is March 8th) in 1911.  In 1981, Congress passed Pub. L. 97-28, which officially recognized the second week of March as Women’s History Week.  Congress, after being petitioned by the National Women’s History Project, passed Pub. L. 100-9, which officially recognized March as Women’s History Month.  According to the Women’s History Month site, “Congress passed additional resolutions requesting and authorizing the President to proclaim March of each year as Women’s History Month” between 1988 and 1994.  March has been observed annually as “Women’s History Month” in numerous proclamations by Presidents Clinton, Bush, and Obama since 1995.

During Women’s History Month, we reflect on the extraordinary accomplishments of women and honor their role in shaping the course of our Nation’s history.  Today, women have reached heights their mothers and grandmothers might only have imagined.  Women now comprise nearly half of our workforce and the majority of students in our colleges and universities.  They scale the skies as astronauts, expand our economy as entrepreneurs and business leaders, and serve our country at the highest levels of government and our Armed Forces.  In honor of the pioneering women who came before us, and in recognition of those who will come after us, this month, we recommit to erasing the remaining inequities facing women in our day. ~ President Barack Obama, Presidential Proclamation – Women’s History Month, 2011

 So let’s take a moment to honor the women past and present who have made tremendous strides for all of us, not just during the month of March, but every day.

Influences: Sonia Sanchez – Catch The Fire

Image courtesy of the Black Bird Press News & Review blog.

Where is your fire?  I say where is your fire?
Can’t you smell it coming out of our past?
The fire of living. . . . . . Not dying
The fire of loving. . . . . Not killing
The fire of Blackness. . . Not gangster shadows.
~ Sonia Sanchez, “Catch The Fire” (1997)

Sonia Sanchez is a phenomenal writer, poet, playwright, storyteller, educator and activist. Sanchez, one of the most influential poets of the Black Arts Movement, has written nearly 20 books of poetry and prose. Her poetry is rich with imagery, history, culture and emotion.  Her words have the ability to incite the mind, warm your heart and touch your soul. And she makes it look so easy.

Sanchez doesn’t take the past struggles or the current plight of our people lightly. In her poem “Catch The Fire” (written for Bill Cosby), she honors our ancestors and encourages our youth to find themselves, love themselves, go after their dreams and live up to the promise and passion of their “fire.”

Sonia Sanchez originally published “Catch The Fire” in Wounded in the House of a Friend (1997).  “Catch The Fire” was also featured in (and inspired the title of) Derrick I. M. Gilbert’s Catch The Fire: A Cross-Generational Anthology of Contemporary African American Poetry (1998).

For more information about Sonia Sanchez, please go to: www.soniasanchez.net.

Black Bloggers Connect: BHM Entry | Kevin Powell – How To Make History (Event Review)

Image courtesy of Vibe Magazine.

Last week, my partner and I had the chance to attend AT&T’s 28 Days Speaker Series here in DC at the Lincoln Theatre.  Hosted by the ever funny comedian Rickey Smiley, the event featured renowned political activist, public speaker, writer, poet, and entrepreneur Kevin Powell.  AT&T’s 28 Days serves as a celebration of Black History Month and a community service initiative.  The program encourages us to recognize our history, find ourselves, and discover ways in which we can make history.

In Kevin Powell’s inspiring and motivational speech, he talked about the importance of knowing our history.  He said “not knowing your history is like a tree without roots.”  Our history helps us gain a better understanding of who we are and where we’re going.  Powell noted three imperatives to history:  faith (having a belief in something greater than yourself), vision (realizing anything is possible and that you can’t make history without a plan), and love (history must be rooted in love; you hate yourself when you don’t know who you are and when you don’t know your history).

Knowing our history is one of the building blocks to both personal and collective success.  Powell said, “Individual success means nothing if the community isn’t doing well.”  With a failing educational system, inherent generations of poverty, dire levels of incarceration and unemployment, there’s still much that we need to do to move our community forward.  Like Powell, I agree that we need to have spaces to engage in dialogue so that we can address the issues in our community and work to resolve them.  Programs like AT&T 28 Days are just one of the ways to fulfill this mission.

Powell closed out his speech by providing a list of six elements that are essential to making history.  These elements are as follows:

  1. A Spiritual Foundation
  2. Political Awareness
  3. Fiscal (or Financial) Responsibility
  4. Manifesting Our Cultural Swag
  5. (Optimal) Physical Health
  6. Mental Wellness 

I firmly believe that our community will be better when we all work to better ourselves both individually and collectively.  We must be selfless.  We must remember our ancestors and our families, for we’re standing on their shoulders.  If it weren’t for their sacrifices and achievements, we wouldn’t be where we are today.  For the the sake of those coming after us, we must pay it forward.  We have to give our people hope.  And as Powell said,”[We can] give hope to people by example.”  So let’s be the example!

For more information about the AT&T 28 Days Speaker Series, go to the AT&T 28 Days site. 

Black Bloggers Connect 2nd Annual Black History Month Blogging Contesthttp://www.blackbloggersconnect.com/articles/173/2-100

From 2012 to 2013: Happy New Year!

The new year is here!  And with it comes the chance to start anew.  Time for reflection and introspection.  The opportunity to take inventory, evaluate, and re-evaluate where you are, where you’re going, where you’d like to be, and what you need to do to get there.  It’s goal-setting time or recognition time for goals you’ve achieved.

If it didn’t work in 2012, don’t bring it into 2013.  If it created a lot of drama in 2012, abolish it and look for ways to alleviate/avoid it altogether in 2013.  If you didn’t like it or wanted to change it in 2012, 2013 is the best time to get started.  Instead of making resolutions, commit to life or lifestyle changes.  But be realistic.  If you’re doing it because it sounds good or because you’re seeking approval from others, you probably won’t be committed to it beyond the first few weeks or months of the year.  Let it be something meaningful.  Let it be something you truly want to do.  If it’s something that benefits the community, environment, or larger societyall the more better.

Looking back on 2012, three of my biggest accomplishments were 1) successfully completing my MBA, 2) my partner and I celebrating our first year of marriage, and 3) publishing my first volume of poetry Prevail: Poems on Life, Love, and Politics.  2012 afforded me the opportunity to form deeper bonds with family and friends.  I was able to network, connect, and learn from so many people in various stages of their careers in the arts and other fields.  I was able to devote more time to my passions (the arts, cooking/baking, etc.).  I got back into my fitness regime and stuck with it for most of the year (at least until my academic life took over in the latter months of the year).  While I didn’t reach all of my fitness goals in 2012, I will continue on with them in 2013.  Another blessing was hearing the news that my mother, who is a three-time cancer survivor, is 100% cancer free.  How relieved we all were to receive this news.  We hope and pray mom’s cancer remission.

There were many struggles in 2012, but I’m not going to harp on them.  I’m leaving them behind but taking the lessons and wisdom forward.  I will be more patient.  Will place more trust in my intuition and the voice within.  I will continue to work to maintain my cool, my calm when situations are heated (approaching these situations with a level-head versus a hot-head is always preferred).  I will give myself more credit and kudos for my accomplishments, skills, talents, and abilities (leaving  self-doubt in the dust).  I will stop forsaking my well-being for the betterment of other things (institutions, organizations) and people (self-neglect doesn’t lead to progression or growth).

In 2013 my (general) goals are: 1) looking for, participating in, and/or creating opportunities to promote my work and myself as an artist (and aspiring renaissance man), prayerfully opportunities that will challenge and strengthen me creatively, socially, mentally, and personally, 2) being proactive and taking the necessary steps for optimal health, 3) doing more to give back to the community, 4) spending more time with family, friends, and godchildren, 5) building stronger connections with fans, followers, peers, and those I admire in the arts, and 6) and hopefully taking a real vacation.

Before closing out, I’d like to take this moment to say from the basement floor of my heart THANK YOU to the readers/followers/supporters/fans for your ongoing love, praise, constructive criticism, and support.  For this, I am extremely humbled, grateful, and blessed.

I wish you and your families an amazing 2013!  Let it be filled with love, joy, harmony, good health, and prosperity!

Peace, Love, and Many Blessings,
BuddahDesmond

It’s Time To Celebrate

Well grades have been posted. I earned a 4.0 this semester.  The MBA is officially done! To say that I’m elated would be an understatement. Traveling down the road that brought me here was far from easy. But I didn’t give up. Further proof of the fruits that faith, determination, diligence, and commitment can can bring you.

Before I move on to the next thing, I’m going to take some to reflect and bask in the glory of this moment. It’s something I’ve often neglected to do after major milestones in my life. I usually just keep it moving… Going forward with little or no breaks. Like a maniac of sorts. But recently, I’ve committed myself to taking it easy and truly living in the moment (especially after major life events like these).

But you know what else it’s time to do? It’s time to CELEBRATE!

Until next time…

Peace, Love, and Many Blessings,

BuddahDesmond

Day 96: Michelle Obama at the DNC 2012

Image courtesy of The Washington Times Communities site.

Michelle Obama is the epitome of what a First Lady should be.  She exudes class, grace, eloquence, and wisdom.  She hasn’t forgotten where she came from and she will not allow us to forget where we’ve come from either.  We cannot sit back and allow ourselves to falter. We have to bring each other up.  It’s about OPPORTUNITY.  When you have it, make sure you’re leaving the door open for others to follow.  Set the example.  Lead with character, honesty, and integrity.