Buddah Desmond’s New Poetry Collection, Coming Up From the Downside: Finding Joy in Our Song, is Out Now!

The celebration continues! Happy to announce that my latest poetry collection, Coming Up From the Downside: Finding Joy in Our Song, is out now!

Coming Up From the Downside is about adversity, healing, resilience, and faith. It’s about overcoming pain, loss, depression, health issues, and heartbreak to get to real love and the joy that sustains us through it all. It’s the third and final book in what I’m calling “The Home Within” trilogy, which was preceded by 2020’s From The Inside Out: A Poetry Collection and 2023’s Everything I Miss(ed) At Home.

The vast majority of the poems in this book were written in the thick of the pandemic. One of the bleakest periods that completely changed my life, and the lives of so many others. It was a season that kept giving lesson after lesson after lesson in the midst of getting up from the downside.

Coming Up From the Downside was published by Liquid Cat Publishing. The cover was designed Black Author Brand. Extremely grateful to my publisher’s team and the Black Author Brand team for their love, support, encouragement, guidance, and great work throughout this process!

And thank you so much for all who’ve supported me along the way. Words aren’t enough to express my gratitude.

Coming Up From the Downside: Finding Joy in Our Song is available for purchase at Amazon. Get into it!

Much Love + Many Blessings! ~ Buddah Desmond

Empowerment – The Fire Within (A 2013 Throwback)

The following piece was written back in 2013. While 4 years have passed, the underlying message is still quite relevant today.


As members of the LGBT community, it’s sad that we still live in a world that cannot see beyond our sexuality. How appalling is it that the masses fail to realize our worth or accept us wholly and completely? When faced with hatred, discrimination, and stereotypical imagery in media and entertainment, we can’t help but feel a bit of shame, guilt, and anger. So many misconceptions and stigmas continue to cloud judgment, perception, and understanding. But for what? Our sexuality is one of so many parts of who we are. While it doesn’t define us, we can’t ignore it. And it’s obvious that public officials, conservatives, and organizations (that shall remain nameless) are obsessed with our sexuality more than we are.

Did the powers that be, holy rollers, and haters forget that we’re human too? We desire, no, we deserve the same things as our heterosexual brothers and sisters – family, friends, love, happiness, success on our own terms, good health… I could go on, as the list is endless. But you wouldn’t know this reading or viewing some of the media and entertainment created daily. How hypocritical can a society be that prides itself on freedom, but shames, victimizes, vilifies, and silences those who don’t fit the preferred, traditional archetype? We’re well past the time to lift the veil on the alienation and isolation that comes as a result of living in such a heteronormative society. But let us not be defeated.

Validation from the outside world may not come in the time, manner, or fashion we desire it to. However, we shouldn’t let it hinder us from living or having what we want in this life. No matter what the outside world says we must remain steadfast in knowing ourselves and trusting what we believe in. No matter what the world says, we are beautiful in every way. We are not less than. We are warriors.

Sometimes we have to forego or question everything we’ve been taught or led to believe as truth to find out who we really are. There’s so much that we deny ourselves when we feed into to the B.S. aimed at refuting our existence. We have to shut ourselves off from the noise and the hysteria to make way for what’s real – to make way for peace, serenity, and truth. When we’re able to free ourselves individually and collectively – the change we see within and around us will be miraculous.

As Audre Lorde said, “Life is very short and what we have to do must be done in the now.” We cannot wait. While we should celebrate the recent Supreme Court rulings in the DOMA and Prop 8 cases for being a step in the right direction for gay marriage, the movement doesn’t stop there. These rulings should only intensify our fight for justice, equality, and freedom for all. And everything we need for this fight lies within.

The key to finding what’s within, the power within, is loving ourselves. We talk a good game about loving ourselves, but how many of us actually do? How many of us can say we truly love ourselves? It’s impossible for us to love ourselves if we continue to allow internalized hatred to ruin our progress. It’s impossible for us to love ourselves if we continue to tolerate the abuse, ill-treatment, and foolishness we encounter daily.

We must not let fear run our authentic selves away. We must be brazen. Stand up for those who were/are not able to stand up for themselves. Realize that in doing so, we’re empowering ourselves and challenging everyone to (always) strive to be and do better.

When we find the love within, the power is never too far behind. When we find our power… When we realize our power… When we utilize our power, its intensity will inspire action and breed the change we need in our families, communities, and the world.

Ours is a power that not only changes lives, but also saves lives. As James Baldwin said, “The world is before you and you need not take it or leave it as it was when you came in.” So let’s find our power and wield it lovingly, strongly, boldly, and unapologetically. It’s our world. Now let the power within—that internal fire—lead the way!

Happy 20th Anniversary to ‘janet.’

Like a moth to a flame/Burned by the fire/My love is blind/Can’t you see my desire?/That’s the way love goes. ~ Janet Jackson, “That’s The Way Love Goes,” janet. (1993)

May 18, 2013 marked 20 years since the release of Janet Jackson’s fifth studio album, janet.  janet. was a departure in sound and style when compared to Control (1986) and Rhythm Nation 1814 (1989).  The album unveiled a different side of Jackson—her sensual side.  Songs from her aforementioned efforts like “Funny How Times Flies (When You’re Having Fun)” and “Someday Is Tonight” provided mere glimpses of what would later be uncovered with janet.  

janet. stands as a declaration of Jackson taking even greater control of the direction of her music and career, composing and co-producing (with Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis) the majority of the music on the album.  If it wasn’t clear before, janet. proved Jackson to be a distinctive, innovative, and monumental force that had come out quite far from the shadow of her family’s fame.  With the removal of her last name, she (continued) to command respect on her own merits.  At the time of the album’s release, Jackson was well on her way to carving her own niche—one that continues to inspire and influence fans and artists alike to this very day.

Jackson’s albums are musical snapshots of specific periods in her life.  janet. represents Jackson’s exploration of her softer, sensual side and the confidence which comes from embracing all facets of ourselves and honoring who we truly are (inside and out).  It’s genuine.  It’s real.  It doesn’t comes off as contrived or pretentious.  You feel Ms. Jackson opening up in ways never heard before (“Anytime, Anyplace,” “The Body That Loves You,” “If,” “You Want This,” and “Throb”).  Aside from sensuality and intimacy, janet. delved deeply into relationships, the ups and downs of love (“Because Of Love,” “Where Are You Now,” “Again,” and “This Time” featuring Kathleen Battle), and the impact of racism and sexism (“New Agenda” featuring Chuck D of Public Enemy).  

Vocally, Jackson delivered some of her most confident, sweet, sexy, and soulful vocals yet.  The songs, expertly paced, run the gamut from R&B/Soul, Funk, Pop, Jazz, Hip-Hop, Opera, and Rock.  janet. is an album that you can play straight through, uninterrupted.  Even at 75+ minutes, it never gets tiring or boring.  After 20 years, it’s safe to say janet. has aged quite well.   

Jackson, Jam, and Lewis easily produced one of the best and most eclectic albums of the 90s (or ever in my book).  janet. has sold over 7 millions copies in the States and over 20 million copies worldwide.  It remains one of her best-selling albums and one of the best selling R&B albums of the SoundScan era.  The album produced 6 Top Ten singles on the Billboard Hot 100 and Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Singles charts, “That’s The Way Love Goes” (#1 Pop/#1 R&B), “If” (#4 Pop/#3 R&B), “Again” (#1 Pop/#7 R&B), “Because Of Love” (#10 Pop/#9 R&B), “Anytime, Anyplace” (#2 Pop/#1 R&B), and “You Want This” (#8 Pop/#9 R&B).  

Musically, thematically, and visually, janet. took Jackson to even greater creative heights and laid the blueprint that many artists would follow soon after.  (Jackson would blow critics, fans, and artists minds alike again in 1997 with the release of The Velvet Rope).
  
Happy 20th anniversary to janet.  We thank you (again), Ms. Jackson, for this masterpiece.

Related Posts:
80’s Albums That Changed My Life
Day 48: Black Music Month – Janet Jackson 
All 4 Janet.

Welcomed Return of The DL Chronicles Series – Latest on MUSED

Image courtesy of MUSED.


I was so happy when I discovered that The DL Chronicles was returning this year.  This trailblazing series turned the whole DL (Down Low) phenomenon on its head by challenging the portrayals of men of color “who by consequence and by choice, live sexually duplicitous and secret lifestyles” (The DL Chronicles site).  I give its creators Deondray Gossett and Quincy LeNear (2 Cents Productions) major kudos for their creativity, fearlessness, and commitment to artfully telling stories that need to be told.  Read my article, “Welcomed Return Of The Critically Acclaimed ‘The DL Chronicles’ Series (VIDEO)” on MUSED.

MUSED Magazine Online is a pioneering “digital destination for lifestyle, entertainment & culture for modern black gay men.  MUSED serves as a collective of experiences and issues we care about” (see About MUSED).  Its mission is to raise the level of consciousness for our community and provide reliable, relevant, interactive, and engaging content for its readers.  MUSED is the only weekly online magazine for black gay men.


Major thanks and props to Drew-Shane Daniels and the MUSED family for featuring the article! 


Follow MUSED on:  Facebook | Twitter

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Peace, Love, and Many Blessings!

~ BuddahDesmond

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Day 86: Gone Too Soon (from Prevail)

In a society that claims to value individual freedoms—it’s a shame that people are (still) ridiculed for simply being themselves.  There’s no reason that anyone should have to hide or live a lie because they fear being ostracized, hurt, or even killed.  It’s unacceptable.  We’ve lost too many due to the hateful, intolerant ways of others in this world.  It must end.  In tribute to those we’ve lost, here’s “Gone Too Soon,” a poem from the “Life” section of my book Prevail: Poems on Life, Love, and Politics.

Gone Too Soon

Battling,
Fighting with the world everyday,
Trying to stand firm on ground that changes like DC metro area weather,
Not knowing when it’s safe to be you, or when it’s best to retreat:
It’s safer on the inside—sometimes.

The golden era ended quicker than you could comprehend.
And you were thrust upon the audacity of disgust and hatred
From people you thought were your friends,
People you thought were your family,
People who said they loved you but you just can’t seem to trust.
You’ve walked a line that many people claim they can handle but couldn’t, even if humanity depended on it.
It’s a line that you don’t want to walk.
It’s a line that often runs faster than the speed of sound and light, with a soundtrack that repeats daily.
And you’re tired of hearing it.

Living in a world where people get high off of ridicule and bullying,
One is left numb,
Not wanting to deal.
The help you need never arrives when you need it.
It always comes too late.
You push and push,
And push and push.
And you keep pushing,
But the force always seems to kill your spirit.
It was at first a temporary thing,
But the period of death began to outlast the periods of rebirth.

There’s a lot that you can and have dealt with,
But it’s the pain and its lasting effects
That cut you down to nubs,
The hurt practically defying man’s comprehension of depth.
If you could only find relief,
A sweet release from it all…
If only…
If…

The inner light quickly fades.
Time halts,
And you succumb to a place
Where your spirit will forever reign.
You’ll be safe from harm and healed
From a lifetime of pain.
If only it didn’t have to come to this.
If only…
If…
You’d still be here.

If only…
If…

You could’ve been saved.

© 2012 BuddahDesmond

Prevail: Poems on Life, Love, and Politicsis available at iUniverse, Amazon (Paperback | Hardcover | Kindle), Barnes & Noble, Book-A-Million (Paperback | Hardcover), and other retailers.

Day 39: OUT (Written in Honor of National Coming Out Day)

In honor of National Coming Out Day, here’s a piece that I wrote entitled “OUT.”

Nothing worse than being silenced, especially in an environment where your voice has a rightful place to be loud and heard.
Nothing worse than living in fear because you don’t know how family, friends, community or the larger society will deal with the “real” you.
Nothing worse than living a lie because you succumbed to complacency and conformity of cultural or societal norms.
Nothing is worse than hiding from everything and everyone (including yourself) because you’ve been led to believe that you are less than or simply not worthy.
It’s bullshit.

Nothing should come before you, your authenticity, or your well-being.
You were made divinely and with a purpose regardless of what mortal beings may tell you.
So honor yourself.
Not just today but everyday.
Because nothing is better than being free.
Nothing is better than being your whole, true self.
Nothing is better than loving yourself.
Nothing is better than love.

(c) BuddahDesmond

Normal?

What is normal?
This question has popped up a lot lately.

Is it pink hair, tattoos, body piercings, and dark clothes?
Is it oversized hoodies, baggy designer jeans, Timbs, and over-the-top bravado and swagger?

Is it the $900,000 condo in a metropolitan area?
Or a cookie cutter single family home in the suburbs?

Is it blue collar or white-collar work?
Or how about a get-rich-quick plan?

Is it traditional? Or is it conventional?
Is it revelatory? Or is it revolutionary?

Is it the big house with seven bedrooms, six full baths, a picket fence, Lexus GS, two kids, and an American Bulldog?
Or is it an unashamed, refusal of the American dream?

Is it conservative or liberal?
Is it republican or democrat?
Is it capitalist, socialist, or communist?
Or is it apolitical?

Is it mainstream or underground?
Is it male, female, or trans?
Is it straight, gay, bi-, multi-, or asexual?
Is it married, common law, or a civil union?
Is it Christian, Hindu, Muslim, Buddhist, or atheist?
And is race, class, or culture a factor?

Wait a minute …
Does normal even know what normal is anymore?
Let’s face it:
We’ve come a long way…. Or have we? (Okay; that’s another poem for another day!)
We’ve evolved into so many different things
With a variety of tastes, likes, dislikes, desires, wants, needs, and dreams.
But the more things change, the more things stay the same
If you look a little bit closer, we tend to be more alike than we are unalike.
So instead of forcing people into what we think is right,
Or how we think people should live
(Translation: what we’re comfortable with),
Just let people be.

And remember—just because it was right for you don’t mean that it’s right for everyone else.

© 2012 BuddahDesmond

On Marriage…

So many marriages are crumbling. Whether it’s people in the spotlight or people in our personal lives. Marriages currently seem to be more like short-lived excursions instead of life-long, fruitful journeys. At this rate, the only couple who looks like they’re going to make it is Whitney & Bobby. Recently, I told two of my friends (who’ll be tying the knot June 2006) if they end of like Babyface and Tracey Edmonds I’m going to cut them both. But seriously, where are the marriages/relationships like Ruby Dee & the late Ossie Davis? You know, marriages like our great-grandparents, grandparents and quite possibly our parents….When the love just seems to get stronger and stronger and the relationship seems to get better and better. When problems arise and they’re able to keep it civil, work it out and stay together….

Today, it seems like people are getting married for all the wrong reasons. Lust. Money. Security. Because a baby is on the way. Not because you want to but because it’s expected. First and foremost it’s supposed to be about love. At the same time, marriage is a business. Once you sign that contract, you’re making an arrangement between you, your spouse and the state (or government). Maybe this part is irrelevant. Then again maybe not. My point is this—why get married if your heart isn’t in it? Why make these arrangements or this commitment if this isn’t the person you truly love and desire? If you’re marrying only for security, what happens if it turns out to be a false sense of security? Marrying for children or because there is a child on the way doesn’t seem to be any better, especially if one (or both) of you has resignations about going thru with it. As we all should know, the children will be affected either way. Even more so if they have to endure unstable, hostile relations between parents who really don’t want or need to be together.

It should be a requirement that before you walk down that aisle, make sure he or she is the one. You also need to make sure you really know each other. There’s nothing worse than getting some unexpected surprises down the line. If there’s something you want or feel you need to know, you better ask! You need to discuss money, children, jobs, relocating, etc., before you jump over that broomstick. Because it’s so easy for any relationship to end, but it’s work if you want the relationship to last. If one person is trying and the other person fails to even make an attempt, you’re going to have some issues.

Another hot component to this discussion is the sanctity of marriage. But this typically comes up with yet another hot button issue—gay marriage. In all honesty, gay marriage is not going to burn down the house of holy matrimony. Newsflash everyone—the sanctity of marriage was already in jeopardy long before the gay marriage debate began. Take a look at TV today. When you have reality shows (really faux reality shows) like The Bachelor, The Bachelorette, Who Wants to Marry My Dad?, Wife Swap, Trading Spouses, and the like, it signifies a big problem in our society with marriage. There are larger issues to consider when statistics say that marriages nowadays are more likely to end in divorce. How about considering many of the following questions: Why people don’t stay together? Why people commit adultery? Why people lie? Why fewer people are deciding to get married? And just how does gay marriage threaten anyone’s idea of marriage? You’re not directly influenced by it – especially if you’re involved in an altogether different relationship. So still, how does it affect you at all? And furthermore, what right does anyone have in invalidating another’s relationship by saying their relationship is insignificant (because of their sexuality)? But I digress.

Maybe the other part of this discussion needs to be reconsidering whether a traditional relationship is right for you. You may not be a fan of traditional. You may want a relationship that’s a bit more radical. Possibly an open relationship. A committed relationship without the basis of monogamy. Or maybe you want the fruits of traditional marriage without all the hoopla. As far as I know, no correlations have been made specifically stating that relationships more often than not fail to endure if there’s been no exchange of rings or a formal ceremony. Marriage, the idea or the actual experience, is not for everyone. You may have to walk down the aisle a couple of times before you figure it out (sadly). But hey, that’s just how it goes.

With all the many wonderful things that we encounter and achieve in this life, isn’t it just nice to share them with someone you love? Someone that’s got your back. Someone that’s always going to be there. Someone you can have great conversations with, cuddle with, laugh with and cry with. Someone that you can rush home to each and every night.

Isn’t this the overall goal? Is it possible? Or is this just wishful thinking? I think that it is possible. But I can only go on what I’ve experienced, what I’ve been exposed to and what I believe. I sincerely hope that the forecast calls for brighter, lighter conditions on the marriage/relationship front for everyone.

What do you think?